11:27 p.m. - Thursday, Jun. 10, 2004
A Good Father.
When I'm an old priest, I want my face to ooze the love of Jesus like a Play-Doh beard.
I was just watching a tape of an old guy on the Catholic network tonight talking about the love of Christ, and I hope that one day I'm like him. His face glowed with the life of God. I want that. I'm getting older, and I want to be a father.
I'm not just talking about a father in terms of the literal priesthood. A friend of mine was talking tonight about what a 'father in the faith' looks like. She said that he is someone who can give wise counsel as well as confront and nurture. When she said that, I felt a bit like a husband who just found out his wife is pregnant. I realized that that is what I am soon to become. That is what God is calling me to. He wants me to be a father.
It looks like I may officially become a deacon at our little church, and I'm realizing what that means for me. I'm going to have authority. I'm going to be a leader in my faith community. I'm going to be a father.
When I saw the old man on the television tonight, it made me think about the kind of man I want to be when I am old, and the kind of man I want to be right now. I want to be a wise man. A man who is at peace. A man who is confident in his place in God's family. A man who exudes the life and love of Christ in his every expression.
God, grant that I may be that man. Let me be confident in who I am in you. Let me not back down from confrontation, but embrace it as an essential part of growth. Let me show my love for my brothers freely and without reservation. Let me have the elderly wisdom that embraces a childish joy. Dear Jesus, make me like that old priest. Make me a good father.
